Therapist a Little Too Excited She Finally Made You Cry

I’ve been in therapy for over a year. Acing it, really. If therapy were an AP high school class I’d totally be snagging a 5. I was being open, allowing myself to be vulnerable…only to the point that it was comfortable for me and mostly when we were talking about other people. Then she started repeating “you are worthy of love” in that soft voice over and over again and hello obnoxious waterworks!

It would have been totally cathartic if she hadn’t sat back with that satisfied, bitch ass smile on her face.

I mean, I thought I was playing this game right the entire time. Predicting what she was writing down on her little notepad, throwing out the current self-improvement term of the moment: “toxic positivity,” “holding space,” “healing process.” But what the fuck Dr. Shevchenko. Why are you smiling like that?

Do you think you know more about me than I do? What qualifies you to make that assessment? Well, actually, your Ph.D. from the University of Wisconsin does but like, poker face doc!? Heard of it!??

“It sounds like you’re finally getting somewhere,” my roommate said after I told her I think I’m good with therapy for the moment. What does she know? What does doctor Dr. Shevchenko know?

Quite a bit actually, see once again: Ph.D. from UW. If you’re reading this Dr. Shevchenko thank you so much it actually felt really good to cry I usually only do that when I’m PMSing and accidentally hurt myself thanks again see you next week.